Happy.

January is over! That went by fast. Real fast. Only 3 more months till spring!

So, it's official. I've been here for a year. 

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?

Crazy. I know.

A lot has happened in a year. It's almost as if I'm a grown up now. No? Not yet. Fair enough. But really, my life is drastically different than it was just a year ago, good and bad. It's been such a fascinating experience being completely independent and constantly battling my innate desires to be overwhelmingly immature and yet having to face the real grown up world; me hiding in a corner vs. me confronting a problem. ew. I'm sure it's something everyone goes through, and yet I know that it must be slightly different not being in a college-like setting. It's weird having to make sure I eat 3 meals a day, as in, I'm in CHARGE of that. It sounds stupid. So, props to you mom for worrying about that constantly my whole life......

It's also been a real eye opener about the horse business. Because it's a breeding farm as well, there are a lot of different aspects to it that I've just never been exposed to. I've learned about breeding, pregnant mares, foals, etc. Just in the last couple months we've started a couple 3-4 year olds, which has been very educational as well. As horrible as it sounds, with there being SO many horses on the property we see the vet a lot, and I have learned a lot about that. Horses that colic, that are lame, giving shots, it's all been so valuable. Being a horse person is definitely a full time job. They need care 24/7. Duh. They need to be exercised and maintained all the time. This is stuff I've always known. I never doubted it, but sometimes it takes a while for it to set in, like, "oh yeah, this is really what it's like."  It's just that now i've been in a situation that is responsible for being on call and giving medication and feeding, and I'm like you know, the horses need me- they need us. It's our responsibility to take great care of them and care for their well being and welfare. They depend on it. In part, that's what makes this job totally different from others. You can never turn it off. It never goes away. 

Something else that never goes away- my inability to ride changes on Caruso :) Kidding, but, sadly, I'm not really. Caruso, my dear friend, quick question. When are we going to get this? Someday, like always? Glad to hear it. The day I ride Prix St. George will be the day that I will never be sad again. I feel like it's only a matter of time, but I've said that before. What do I know? Jochen has been riding him some and has gotten a couple of clean changes on him, but Caruso still puts up a good little fight. I know I feel like every horse owner who watches a professional ride their horse who is giving them trouble. I am sad that even Jochen has trouble but at the same time I'm glad to see that it's not just me. But, we will keep pressing on with it. It's gotten to the point where the changes are just such a huge issue. I over analyze EVERYTHING about them and just psyche myself out. We go up to a change and I say "Sweet baby Jesus help us all." But, who knows, maybe next year I'll be writing my life story, "From Hell and Back: how NOT to ride a flying change." It should be a best seller. 

So. It's pretty much February. then March. then April. then my birthday. then June. then before you know it, I'll be old and retired. YAY LIFE!

On a side note, having nothing to do with anything above, I really want to adopt a dog....but financially I can't really do that...unless Caruso stops getting 4 shoes every 5 weeks.......then I would make double what I do now and I could afford to keep a dog. YAY! But that's not really an option. Ohhh well. I guess it's back to living alone for now...